• Imani White

How to Quiet Negative Voices so You Can Hear Your Own

Ever write something down that you thought was just the coolest thing..and then you go back a few days later... Yeah, kind of what happens when you write two blog posts and take a 5 month break.  Welcome back!  Heads up!  This is where I write straight from the heart and place it out to the world. No real editing(I'll spell check of course...sometimes).

I have to say, part of my long break was because of this topic. The more time I spent away the more reasons I gave myself as to why it was actually a good thing. Maybe it was. I have been trying to "re-root" myself in who I am and whatever all of that means. Yep, kind of been having my Eat-Pray-Love meets every chick flick rom-com independence moments. After a period of hurt and growing pains sometimes you have to take a step back. And during those times it's hard to remember who you are and who you want to be. So here are a few things I have learned in the past few months that hopefully will help you if those unwanted voices are just a little too loud. 

1. Reflect

I like to look back at what I used to do. Not in a judgmental way, but almost as if you've never met yourself before! And I mean I will go waaayyy back. Someone once taught me that if you wanted to find your purpose, a way to do that is by taking note of what you did as a toddler. Before anyone had you in school, or when TV wouldn't necessarily leave a mark on you, what is it that you naturally did? What did you play with? What did you like/not like? Who did you pretend to be? So I will watch baby videos, toddler videos, and  I'll especially watch my pre-teen show choir/music performances. Watch how you used to be before the world told you who you were supposed to be! The world knows that it needs you, it just doesn't know where your piece fits in the puzzle. You have to help it. No one will have the thoughts and the passions that you do because no one else is designed to. So take a second and "Remember who you are."(yes....said in a Mufasa voice. Great job.)


Now this one seems a little self-explanatory for me, but oh does it help. Besides all of the scientific facts that show how it actually improves your health physically, it helps mentally so much more. When I say move, I mean you simply have to remove yourself from where you are right now. If depression or anxiety or self-doubt is creeping in, you need to go outside and get air immediately. Just sit in front of your house or in the back yard you don't have to go anywhere fancy. Get a change of scenery as best as you can and it will help restart everything. 

3.See a Friend

In any way that you can, see a friend. If all you can do is a phone call, then that's great. If you can see them in person? All the better. (It doesn't have to be a friend, buuuuut might be easier) Sometimes hard thoughts creep in just because we are alone too much. Seeing someone can instantly wipe them away. And if it's the right person? You may not even have to "vent" to them, you will be too busy having fun that before won't even matter anymore. Of course balance it out though, there's a time for everything. Take a moment to just enjoy being with someone and letting them feel comfortable around you. Listen to them first, and you won't even be able to hear anything else. 

4.Control your "thought waves"

Fear feeds fear. And the more quiet the environment, the more likely it is that you will be fixated on that thought and let it grow. The trick is to not let it take hold of you-not stop it or fight it(because that will only make it grow louder so you can really hear it). Let it come into your mind and pass when it will naturally pass. A thought isn't certainty, it's more of a possibility. The only power they have is when you chose to focus on them. So let the good ones grow instead. 

I took this idea from an amazing speaker (Prince Ea, some might recognize his videos) who explains how your thoughts are like waves in an ocean or clouds in the sky. They come and they go. But eventually, they all go. And he mentions how our natural place is not as the thoughts, but as the observer of those thoughts.


Sorta-kinda my favorite step. It's a technique I have been using recently. Sometimes I don't even know I'm doing it haha. It's a habit now. I like to think that when you sing loud, strong, and without any care of how the note will technically come out of your mouth, you will find a voice in you that you never knew you had. You soul knows what it wants to say, and I feel the best way to hear that is through song because you're expressing more than just words. You have a melody, a rhythm, a heartbeat/tempo, a style to it. I feel that it's all the elements of the heart expressed in under 3 minutes. I like to think because it comes straight from the heart that it shows the truest form of a person. You can tell a lot by how someone sings. So grab a karaoke track, a piano, a guitar (or in my case a ukulele sometimes) and sing your heart out! When you're done, there's this really cool silence...it's almost like all of the bad thoughts are stunned and kinda don't know what to do with themselves so they just head out. 

I hope you all enjoyed this. Please let me know if there are any other topics you would like for me to discuss-or! If you have any tips or tricks to share! Thank you for reading!